Just wanted to write.
Mood:  hug me
Hey I am so happy for some reason today. I just didn't think about what has been going on. I was a little sick when I went to work, but I am fine now. I can't seem to eat a lot of pork. I wonder why my body can't digest it that much any more. I feel a lot better. I guess when you don't worry about things they don't seem that bad. I am praying that things will work out for the best. We should all be careful what we say to people. We don't know how what we say to people might affect others. We should think first and answer later. Today I just put things into perspective and decided not to think so hard about things. Jesus knows how much we can handle. He said he will put no more than we can bare. Lord help us to learn to bare one anothers burdens. I can't answer for everyone only me. I know that I have alot to answer about. In all my years of living I have not had to deal with this kind of thing. Maybe one day before it is to late God will grant me knowledge to deal with this thing that is troubling.

Angry Wife
Mood:  don't ask
Hey I just had to chat with myself today. I can't believe my husband and all his crazy ways. I can't believe a man can tell you he love you and then tell you ain't shit. I have been with him 3 yrs plus and  I still don't know who he is. I can't seem to get over how he tried me. I gave up everything I was to be the woman he wanted me to be. He think I am nothing. If everytime you and him get into an argument and he tells you the same thing he means it. I was giving him money when he need it and love when he wanted it. Now I have to regroup. I have had enough of his bull shit. I wasn't look for a man when I meet him. I was just living my life. Now I have to undo all his bull shit. I don't want any more problems from any man in my life. I can't take any more . I need to talk to Madea maybe she can help me with this problem. God knows how I am hurting and crying on the inside. Do anybody else understand what I am going through.

A quik thought.
Mood:  not sure
Today is not a good day. I can't understand how a man can say he loves you and then tell you ain't shit and never will be shit. I think that is  a lye. I find it hard to one minute say you love me and next say all those words. The word of God say you can't have blessing and cursing coming out the same vessel. So which one is it. I have a wake up call that has come this way. I am trying to find out what it means to be at a lost for words. This a wake up call for all people in a relationship. If your spouse all ways says nasty thing to you all the time and say it was the achol. They are not Jamie Foxx. So that is really what is in their hearts. They really mean what they say. So I have to make this decision on my on. I have to see If I can live with this hurtfull thing. I wish I would have come to this decision before I got married. Now I just can't make a hasty decision. I have to pray and really wait on God for some good advise. This hard on me I just can't smile and think this never happened. This is a deep hurt that I have to nurse back to health or to a place where I can live with myself. only God knows where we go from here. Will write more next time. Goodnite

Man who lies
Mood:  irritated

Yesterday my husband pissed me off. He goes in the store and some female starts buying him things. And he thinks I don't know that he is playing me. He thinks that I am slow and don't catch on fast. I want him to know that I am not a fool. He got on my last nerves. He can't see the big picture. He needs to know that Sophia is very smart and that my name means wisdom not dummy. Only God and the people in the store know what happened in the store. I can't believe that he has started doing the same things all over again. He tried to blame it on the Achol. But that is  Jamie Foxx's line. He mastered that before Jamie Foxx put it out. I should have known that his bullsh-t would become famous for somebody. He didn't know that I didn't know what amount of money he had on him. Now he is trying to find out what I am writing in my Journal. He is tripping. Kept me up all last night. Didn't get to bed until 3am. And then I still had to get up early and I still had to get up early last night. He is trying my patiences. If only he knew what is going on my head he would stop with the b-s.

Don't know what to do
Mood:  don't ask
To day is the day before my anniversary and I don't understand why I got married. My husband has rejected all the things I want to do to celebrate the day. He does'nt want to go to the beach and he does'nt want to go to Lake Blackshear. I want to spend time with him, but he does'nt want to spend time with me. It is like he does'nt want me and scared to tell me. I can't read his mind. He want talk to me at all. I tried to make a sexual advance on him and he was'nt interested. I need for him to tell me what his problem is so I can deal with the cituation.  We have only been married a year and he has already started acting not interested. This is a mess. He should have told me he didn't want me so we could have avoided this cituation. signed perplexed

The maddness of men
Mood:  don't ask
Look today I don't understand why me say stupid stuff, like shut up and the police is after you. They need to be more sensible about things.  I know me have low self esteem but this is ridiculious. I don't like being pissed off. If you don't want to cook me something don't worry about it. You don't work and it would be nice. since I am the one working. I come home and have to listen to your sorry day. Who cares. I see why you don't have many friends. I need more energy to deal with this. Can't seem to understand why you have so many negative things to say about everybody. But you don't have any good things to say. You are a dark person and don't know it. I am a positive person, a person of light. This man who can't read and just can count say write about how it feels about messing up my life. How ignorant can't you be. People who can't read and have a low selfesteem say the craziest things about life, they wan't to bring you down in gutter with them.

Just checking

Today I got a lesson in motherhood. After you feed them and clothes them. love them and doctor on them. Then they turn their backs on you and tell you they are not bothered. I don't understand them. They are the 3rd and 4th generation. They don't know what love is and don't care. Now at 17 she thinks she is grow. Lord only if she knew the truth she would wish to be a baby again. God has to bring her to a reality check. I like this blog. I can think out loud. I wonder will my daughter ever come to reality before it is to late.  Also today a friend of my oldest daughter buried her 19 year old son. Lord please help these teenagers before you come back. So many people are not ready. Lord help me to get ready for your coming. Give me strength and courage to endure until the end. Amen

Rainy days
Today is a rainy day. I had to drive a little bit in it. It is also the day everybody wants to stay home and sleep. I took my grandson to have some surgery and got some numbing medicine on my lip. now my lip feels like somebody punched me in it. I hope the effects where off so. I am suppose to be going out with my husband.  Not pretty.

GOOD FOOD
HEY I WISH I COULD GO AND GET ME SOME GOOD LOBSTER AND CRAB LEGS. BUT I HAVE TO WORK. MAYBE NEXT TIME WHEN I HAVE SOME MONEY. TODAY ISNT THE DAY.

Todays Bible Verses
Matthew 6:1-4 NLT version. Take care! Don't do your good deeds publicly, to be admired, because then you will lose the reward from your Father in heaven. When you give a gift to someone in need, don't shout about it as the hypocrites do-blowing trumpets in the synagogues and streets to call attention to their acts of charity! I assure you, they have received all the reward they will ever get.  But when you give to someone don't tell your left hand what your right hand is doing. Give your gifts in secret, and your Father, who knows all secrets, will reward you. Amen